Can't believe that I Kelvin the Fallen Greatness is feeling inferior. Haiz. Since when have decadence caught up with me?
-Interruption from my mother. My ill temper showed again. Evidence that my world is indeed deprived of love. That makes me incomplete. Damn. An early morning dream made me realise this crude fact. I realise I don't have to give in to her for everything. Sometimes, filial piety doesn't apply. I am becoming more and more convinced with the individualist concept. In which families don't exist. Or is this just the result of being incomplete. Lastly, she is always talking of "when i grow up i will change and blah blah". Fucking hell. I think it's time she grows up. Now i am totally convinced that nothing I learnt came from her.Talk about character moulding, I probably learnt from her negative examples. Argg!!! Her character sucks so badly I feel embarassed at times. I feel trapped. Is this the stand alone complex? What does this reflect about my character? That I suck equally. Darn, I believe its true that kids these days talk back and challenge more established concepts because of education. The previous generation can only go so far. Afterall, darwinism applies not just to biological science. The bottomline, I seriously hate it when she boss around as big "mom". You want something you go get it yourself. Don't expect me to compromise on anything based solely on the reason that you are my parents. She has no right to tell me whats right and wrong. Waoh strong statement here eh. Of course, someone who is unable to reason and take responsibility for her own life and actions have no right to infringe upon my life. No matter who the person is. Manage yourself before you try to manage your child. Another irony here, as I sense how this invokes me as well.
Who said that one must have love to be a complete person. I shall challenge that notion. Correct,love might be the strongest tool of human consciousness. Without it, I can still survive achieve great things.
All this shit just makes me feel more and more inferior. Damn, why am I falling into such a pitfall. I just got out of that period of fragileness and uncertainty a few months ago. I don't want to cross back to those dark days. No.
Be yourself, only better. If it pricks me, its going to be crushed.
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